Diddy flow *Last night I deaded all the guys around me* lol Nah actually I just know now that I can move on and not care about "Oh there's no one out there for me" or my idea that I can't be seen in any other way than how I see myself (my biggest fear is being alone). Which they proved wrong through out the night so I'm fine with it because that's done with but nothings really changed.
Anyway a lot of good things happened (like people actually getting along) and some that shouldn't have happened (like my cousin's ex arguing with one of the guys we chilled with) but its weird to explain.
There are things that I know but can't tell anyone. I mean no one, because I told one of the other parties I wouldn't. Both sides of both situations are close to me. On one side is a family member on the other is a friend (both of which have at some point been a very close friend). I have one cousin calling me fake and both questioning what they can and can not talk to me about. It's hectic but one I can deal with and not fuck up but the other is to late.
I knew I shouldn't have but we're family and my cousin was suffering. So whether my friend finds out or not I'm fine with it I will lose a friend and maybe my cousin wasn't worth it but they deserved to know where I stood in that situation and that I was there for them. Some people might think what I did was wrong and selfish, fuck it most people will but I did what I thought was right and just under the scope of what they asked me nothing more than what they wanted to know. I don't plan to betray a friend but I know I won't I have learned my lesson already. It's the cousin I'm worried about. Finally thinks they know now what they want I just hope it's not to late, there are only 2 consequences love or closure the thing is pick a cousin they both have this choice.
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